I’m curious about this. I recently got one season of Fons And Porter’s Love of Quilting shows from the library and in one of the episodes  one of the ladies (I have never paid attention to who is who) made some offhand remark about how seasoned quilters tend not to give nearly as much away than noobies. And the other lady snickered and said, absolutely, no way. Is that beecause after you’ve made a bunch of blankets, clothes, what not, you really appreciate all the effort that goes into it that a recipient is unlikely to get? Or that you jealously guard sewing time for yourself? What’s the thought here?

I think when I first started crocheting (because, hey, that’s where I started my textile journey), I remember thinking that I’d have to give away a bunch or end up in a house with a gajillion blankets, which would seem sort of stupid.  So I did–and, idiot that I am, I rarely took pix of the stuff that I gave away and didn’t track what projects/patterns I had done. So now I go to look at a pattern and think, wait, did I do that? Did I HATE making that?? Hmmm *scratches head* start making it anyway and get two days into and think “AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! I have made this bloody thing before and I”m NOT putting myself through that again!” (oops–tangent!)

I think with quilty stuff too, I tended to make exactly what the pattern said instead of acknowledging–hey cool pattern, but I have GOT to make some changes because I”m simply not the table runner type. I think this came from fear of making mistakes–so I couldn’t alter the pattern or I can’t make mistakes if someone else is choosing my fabrics etc. Like the year that I joined a Thimbleberries year long quilt club and realized way, way too late that 1) it was  a basket theme all year (I could do a basket thing say once every ten years and be set) and 2) it was almost all table runners except for a couple of hokey wall hangings that weren’t going anywhere in my house. Sigh. I’ll never get back the hours of my life that I put into those projects that I didn’t like. Or the basket block swap where I still have a queen sized basket quilt, made with colors I don’t like, with folks who weren’t precise in their blocks. At least I learned that I’m unable to do swaps anymore–because I hated that. (Oops-another tangent!)

What’s my point here? I forget! No, just kidding. It’s just the ridiculous things that I made as a more noobie sewist/crocheter that I shouldn’t have and that I’m glad I don’t have around anymore. The flip side is that I’m no longer that noobie chick and have taken stock in the fact that I have made nothing, zero, nada, bubkiss for myself, something I really want just for me in nearly two years. It’s true. I’ve made a few baby blankets for others, halloween costumes for others (which I won’t do anymore–I can’t sew to deadlines; it makes me unhappy–uh, tangent??), and the rest of what I do is for Bunny. While she usually thinks it’s neat–I think the awe of “wow, mommy can do that” has worn off and she thinks of it more as a matter of course (wait for upcoming post on her underwhelmedness on her bedroom curtains).

So i decided this week to break the pattern in a big way and the next 5 things I made would be for me–which I already broke by agreeing to make some pumpkin things with Bunny today for the house (kind of also for me, then, right?? Not so much really). Maybe I need to make a list of what I want and then I’ll stick with it better?? Gotta give this some thought and creatively rejuvenate.

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